Celebrity Odds

Categories: Humor, Movies, Other Stuff, TV

Celebrity Odds
Written by Tony DiGerolamo
Copyright 2010

What are the odds that you will someday be famous? We don’t know! But what we do know is that it’s fun to lay odds on what the people that are famous might actually do! So place your bets and remember to never, ever bet on Mel Gibson.

Johnny Knoxville
1 to 20 Odds he still has a spleen.
1 to 4 Odds he’ll live to spend the millions he’s made from Jackass.
1 to 10,000 Odds that there’s a more embarrassing video of him on YouTube.
1 to 6 Odds he’d notice getting shot.
1 to 3 million Odds that he’d be in this movie if the Dukes of Hazzard remake took off.

Anne Hathaway
1 to 5 Odds she’ll play 3 card monte on a street corner.
1 to 10,000 Odds she’ll win.
1 to 5 Odds she’ll date the guy running the game.
1 to 2 Odds that she’ll have to do a Playboy spread to regain her money.
1 to 3 Odds some guy with a Ponzi scheme is talking to her right now.

Randy Quaid
1 to 3 Odds he’ll be in jail soon.
1 to 4 Odds that he’s hiding in a house that he used to own.
1 to 6 Odds that he’s hiding in your house.
1 to 50,000 Odds that he’ll be starring in Christmas Vacation II
1 to 2 Odds that he’ll be getting his own reality show.

Rand Paul
1 to 4 million Odds that he’s not a Christian.
1 to 1 Odds that Obama supporters would like that rumor to stick.
1 to 1 Odds that the Tea Party supporters will vote for him.
1 to 1 Odds that they’ll embarrass him before the election is over.
1 to 1 million Odds he’ll ever go on The Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell.

Barack Obama
1 to million Odds you’ll catch him praying to Mecca.
1 to 1 Odds he’ll be on Mythbusters.
1 to 10 mil. Odds they’ll try and bust the myth that he’s a Muslim.
1 to 2 Odds they’ll just end up talking about College hoops.
1 to 500 Odds Jamie Hyneman knows anything about sports.